Finish Line
I said goodbye.
Yes, I broke up with the man I have loved for 6 years. I knew him that long and I loved him since then. He’s been my best friend since I entered college, and we have consistently been comfortable in sharing our lives with each other. Nonetheless, we’ve been together for just 7 months which seems short yet the longest and most memorable months in my life ever.
I said I got tired. He has a lot of complaints about me and my actions, especially my tendency to do things against his will. Of all things, I hate it when somebody takes control over my decisions especially when I am forbidden to do something I want to do. MATIGAS ANG ULO KO. But he does not know how it is to be bombarded with messages containing the same thing. He does not know how hard it is to report everything I do each time. He does not know how it is to be forbidden to watch a movie with a good friend, and have dinner with my closest friends. It seems that he wants me to spend time with no one but him, unconsciously.
I loved him still.
I loved him even when I saw him write crappy comments on another girl’s page. I loved him even when he continued keeping in touch with an ex. I loved him even when he gets unreasonably jealous. I loved him in spite of it all.
I might love him for the rest of my life but I love myself more. In our relationship, it seemed that there can never be me if not for him, and that I can’t last a day without him. I actually planned everything in my life with him. But then, as I am being strained by his love, I have reached the finish line to a former unlimited forgiveness, and patience, and mercy. How ironic.
I guess, even the most magnificent full bloom of love has an end. Even the strongest man gets tired. And so, who am I to pretend that I am strong enough to persist the symptoms of a ruined relationship?
I love him, but I have to bid goodbye.
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